Week 20/21 - Thursday 20th August

Hello friends!

It's been an odd couple of weeks.  I'm eating well, apart from when it was super hot.  30+ degrees in Britain, what's that all about?!  I can roam like the rest of you, but I really don't want to.  I guess I've been shielded from the world for so long, I'm not sure I want to see what's outside.

I was thinking of a couple of things I would like to go out and buy, then I ran through all the pros and cons then I chickened out.  It saves me money, it's not something that's vital, and let's be honest, I need to ease my way back into the wide world, after being away so long.

The last 7 days have been challenging.  For those that don't know, I live with something called SAD, Seasonally Affective Disorder.  My body struggles to function during the wintery months, which does include really bad weather days.  Symptoms I experience include struggling for sleep, low mood, lethargy, change of appetite, low self-esteem, less sociable and lacking interest in normal daily activities.

I've experienced this over a few days, but I have light boxes which helps to an extent, and trying to be active, but I'm not using any medication. This is a choice I have made, although I was given the option by the doctor at diagnosis.

I was also made aware that at the end of last week, someone I knew passed away, but out of respect for the family and their close friends, I won't got into any further detail.  I will however say it had impacted me, and I spent the majority of the night with my brain running through so many different thoughts.  This is not meant to get sympathy, but just an awareness of what's been happening.  If anything, I would like to highlight that if you can, make sure your friends and family are ok.  When you ask them how they are, ask them again if they're unsure.  Sometimes, giving someone the time to open up can make all the difference.  We've all got our challenges in life, and a lot of it you can't tell from face value.  You don't need to have any answers, but pointing someone in the right direction may help massively.

Lastly, I've come to realise that I've been having spurts of "chemo-brain".  I did find concentrating difficult during treatment.  I'd liken it to really exerting yourself, but thinking too much would exhaust my brain.  I noticed over the last couple of days, when I've done short trips in the car, I can't concentrate all the time on conversations while driving, especially where I live, where a lot of roads aren't A roads, a lot of them are lanes.

Looking back makes it easier to identify these things, and now I'm going to make a note of any situation where I'm experiencing "chemo-brain" (this will take you to the Macmillan site, via a new window) so I can try and prevent it happening, or improve it.  Clearly diet and exercise helps improves mental health and well-being, and that's been the foundation of my recovery (as well as the odd bar of chocolate and slice or three of cake - gotta put those lost pounds back on!).  I've also been listening to music a lot more.  It's something that's been a constant through my life, whether listening to, or attempting to play.  I also listened to a few vinyl the other day, and it really raised my mood.


That's the update for now.  Stay safe, stay well and look out for one another x x

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